Today was supposed to be a simple non-stop 20 minute run at Choctaw Creek Park. I struggled early on, partly with the heat, and also because I haven't used the metronome to determine cadence in months. The huarache straps were a minor annoyance, but I thought I could get through the workout with little difficulty. I was in a fairly meditative state when I thought of Hildegard von Bingen's "Feather on the Breath of God", which I contemplated until my intestines rumbled, and I suddenly found discomfort to go along with a fair amount of urgency. It took three tries to find a working porta-potty before I made a mess of my running shorts. Every time I tried to run in between, the worse my situation became. I made it, however, and realized that the run would have to be bagged after that. I was five minutes away from the goal. I have wondered what I should do. I think the best thing would be to just move on to the next workout and go from there.
I had tried to be more spiritual when I ran in the past, but it never seemed to work. I could handle running to military jodys. But anything else just didn't seem to work. I think I expected the meditations to take care of the running for me, rather than looking meditating to help me take care of the running. The difference in there is that I do the work to make it happen. I think. I am still sorting it out.
I contemplate new directions that my life could go in. Physical therapy instead of becoming an RN? I could make it happen at OU after all, given what I have been reading. My doors of opportunity may still be open, and I've just been trying to open the wrong ones.
Lastly, everybody talks a great line about running with other people in running clubs. It's great if you live anywhere but rural Oklahoma. I finally realized today, however, that your running club doesn't have to have people in it. With that in mind, the Crazy Lady Ultrarunning Party was mostly born. Is born. It's me, Kinzie, Annie and Mischief (the token honorary guy). We'll crash ultras, steal the beer, and forget to collect the awards. It's all in the name of Fun.
There will be more to come on that. For now, it is late.
