This is what the new 40 looks like.  She is healthier and feels better than she did at 30.

Trail tested the B2R trail prototypes today...Had a blast! Check out the pics! Feel just as good as the road version, no slipping while climbing up the steep sandy trail, good grip on wobbly rocks, can feel the ground...but not those pesky sharp little rocks! And they match my favorite running outfit!

Here's what happens when you let go of expectations and explore the possibilities....or as some might say..."demand the impossible"?!  First female finisher and broke female course record. Who'da thunk it possible a couple years ago? Not me.  Happy girl with race director.

I had a longer speed interval to do today, 20 minute warm up then a pace I wasn't sure I could hold for a full 60 minutes. I've held that pace...barely...in a race scenerio.  I've held that pace for shorter distances on road..I've held faster paces on a nice flat soft track-shorte distances though.  So yesterday i spent much time pondering and plotting a course...of course trying to make it as flat as possible on road! Although Tahlequah is not particularly hilly, it is not particularly flat either.  So after dinner I drove out my course.  Then I thought, how am I going to keep myself motivated to stay at a pace I'm not sure I can do for 60 minute,s which I'm sure will seem like an eternity.  Bear chase.  I'll imagine a bear chasing me.  It will be a predawn solo run with headlamp anyway adding to seeming reality of being chased.  That may be enough to keep me moving. So...this morning after 20 minutes of warm up....ready...set...go!  That pace didn't seem so bad at first and I felt like the bear and I were loping along...I imagined the bear not being highly motivated at that point to catch me...Ha..and me not being highly motivated to outrun him...yet.  The first part of the course was downhill/flat which made it seem deceptively easy.  Then came that slight uphill grade at about 25 minutes...oh so slight...but of course felt like 6%....Now I was starting to picture the bear getting a little more motivated to catch me.  The slight uphill continued on to about 45 minutes where I decided I did not care any longer whether or not the bear caught me, or mangled my body and used my bones for toothpicks....Uh oh.... Gonna have to ditch that visualization.  Thinking...thinking... moved on to visualizing being chased down by another runner. That did the trick.  Kicked back in the game and finished staying in my goal pace zone.  I had to laugh as I ran.... What's more frightening to me? Another runner catching me.  Another human being chasing me down is more motivating to me than the threat of death.  That's just wrong.

Or as one runner on today's course named it...the "Ouch-ita Trail"!  30is runners toed the start line at the unoffical Ouachita Switchback Trail Race.  I think it will be official next year and the years to come.  Check out the race page at ouachitaswitchbacks.blogspot.com. Tommy Brennan is an awesome race director.  Today was more bitter than sweet for me.  It has been about 3 months since I've been out there. She is a tough, rugged, but beautiful trail stretching neary 200 miles from Oklahoma through Arkansas in the Ouachita Mountains. My goal today was to keep it comfortable and just enjoy the trail run. Ahhh, this young grasshopper fell into the trap of expectations.  Back to the race.  I was not intending to race. That was not today's agenda. The first 4 miles were easy rolling hills...laiden with her notorious rocks, roots, creek crossings and thorns.  It felt fun and relatively easy those first 4 miles, although I could feel myself pushing the upper limit of "comfortable" early on.  I came into the first aid station behind the front pack of boys. I was happy with my spot (because this was were I EXPECTED to be).  The next 2+ miles were a steady up up up. Over boulder field, severaly large downed trees and more and more rocks and roots. I wasn't feeling as comfortable.  So what choice did I make?  Relax, slow down, let the trail come to me, enjoy the beauty around me?  Well of course not!  And Ouachita Mountain's response?  "Tisk tisk little girl, you know better than to fight me!"  Like a stubbonr 3 year old I charged forward, getting more and more tired, slowing down, looking at my watch.."shit, is that all my heart rate is?  Is that all my pace is?"  Of course I didn't realize my 3 year old mentality at the time. I attributed slowing down to "just trying to keep it comfortable", I wasn't "trying" anything other than to move faster and feel better moving faster.  At about mile 5-6 a nice little break from the up...a number of switchbacks down into a saddle section before going up again. I regained a little steam, then up the next set of switchbacks. 32 of them to be precise.  Oh did I get pissed off.  Last time I was out there I was able to run (albeit slow!) up all of those switchbacks.  Today I hiked darn near every one.  I got really aggrevated. Fists clenched, head down, charging up those switchbacks...and Ouachita's response?  Tisk Tisk young lady.  I'm disappointed you refuse to enjoy what I have here for you. You brought company and you are acting like a big baby". Like a 3 year old I charged on.  Of course I told myself I was not running becuase I was supposed to be taking it easy, but really I was not running because I couldn't. I got to the top of the switchbacks, the turnaround and sat on a rock and ate my pb sandwich...perfect opportunity to chillax and rethink my attitude and reset myself.  Did I make the right choice?  NOPE!  I still believed I was NOT succumbing to my own expectations, that I WAS taking it easy and letting the trail come to me, keeping it comfortable, yadda, yadda, yadda. The whole while the Ouachita trail saying, "you still have much to learn, let me teach you". I was in no mood to be taught anything at that point.  My stomach revolted against the pb sandwich for the next mile and a half and my dual chamber hydration pack wasn't working right.  The water bladder tube was not working, so only electrolyte drink for 14 miles.  Did I stop to fix it so I could have water?  NOPE!  And Ouachita Mt said, "tisk tisk".  By the time I got to the 14 mile aid station I was sooo thirsty for water.  Fixed my pack and guzzled water the next 3.5 miles to the finish. Still so much to learn.  Disappointed that I succumbed to my own expectations, that I was unwilling to accept where I was at and embrace it and form it into a positive experience.  I know how to do the latter, I've done it before, and it is an amazing experience.  Learn and grow.  Learn and grow.

I have a bittersweet relationship with this trail...very bitter for the first few go arounds!  (see waaaay back posts!). It is now a very sweet relationship, I have a great deal of respect for her...she has taught me so much about myself.  I see myself, the world, and those around me different because of her lessons.  Saturday I go back to learn more.  17.7 miles of rugged, rooty, technical, steep terrian.  This is the first time I will run with other people out there.  It's weird, it's always been just she and I. This will be an "unofficial" race.  The organizer couldn't get all the permits for an official race.  Going to be about 30-50 runners running either a 25 k (actually about 17-18 miles) or 50k (likely a little more than 50 as well!).  I don't plan to race, I'm supposed to be smart and take it easy on this one.... since I just started back after a small winter's nap. That winter's nap however has charged my batteries pretty seriously and I wanna join every race in sight right now!  I have beat myself enough up on this trail to know how rough and unforgiving she is.  I like to think she looks forward to seeing me too. To see how I've grown as a trail runner, how I've learned to respect her and pay attention to the lessons she offers me...and I'm sure to laugh at how I fumble and stumble over her tricks and treats.  I so enjoy her and I hope she enjoys me too.  Looking forward to more lessons learned and a greater fondness for that damn tough trail.  Will let you know how it goes!